funny quotes and cartoons

Logic hasn't wholly dispelled the society of witches and prophets and sorcerers and soothsayers. ~Raymond F. Jones, The Non-Statistical Man



It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road. ~Author unknown, as seen on a bumper sticker



Vivisection is a social evil because if it advances human knowledge, it does so at the expense of human character. ~George Bernard Shaw



Some so speak in exaggerations and superlatives that we need to make a large discount from their statements before we can come at their real meaning. ~Tryon Edwards



Beauty comes as much from the mind as from the eye. ~Grey Livingston



A parent's love is whole no matter how many times divided. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com



Why do children want to grow up? Because they experience their lives as constrained by immaturity and perceive adulthood as a condition of greater freedom and opportunity. But what is there today, in America, that very poor and very rich adolescents want to do but cannot do? Not much: they can "do" drugs, "have" sex, "make" babies, and "get" money (from their parents, crime, or the State). For such adolescents, adulthood becomes synonymous with responsibility rather than liberty. Is it any surprise that they remain adolescents? ~Thomas Szasz



But it seems an irony of creation that man's mind knows how to handle things the better the farther removed they are from the center of his existence. Thus we are cleverest where knowledge matters least.... ~Hermann Weyl



God can heal a broken heart, but He has to have all the pieces. ~Author Unknown



I believe in God, but I'm not too clear on the other details. ~Bill Veeck



Even our misfortunes are a part of our belongings. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery, Night Flight, 1931, translated from French by Stuart Gilbert



But can one still make resolutions when one is over forty? I live according to twenty-year-old habits. ~Andre Gide



It was subtle of God to learn Greek when he wished to become an author - and not to learn it better. ~Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil, 1886



If I leave here tomorrow, will you still remember me? ~Allen Collins and Ronnie Van Zant, "Free Bird," One More From the Road, 1973, performed by Lynyrd Skynyrd



Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. ~Maori Proverb



Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear. ~Mark Twain, Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar, 1894



Life is an onion and one cries while peeling it. ~French Proverb



Happiness held is the seed; happiness shared is the flower. ~Author Unknown



Middle age is youth without its levity, and age without decay. ~Daniel Defoe



I like the smell of a dunged field, and the tumult of a popular election. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827